Friday, September 2, 2016

Just Keep Swimming

In January of 2015 I wrote a blog post about choosing to be happy. I made the conscious choice to attempt to choose positivity and happiness over falling into a pit of despair and negativity. Don't get me wrong, I stand at the edge of that pit and think about diving in head first and grabbing a few candy bars for good measure.  However 95% (nobody's perfect) of the time I am able to back away from the cliff, push the reset button and push forward.

I have been in that pondering mood again. Why? How? That is what I ask myself. How and why have I been able to maintain my attempt for the past 20 months.  When I reflected and came to certain realizations, I felt I needed to share.

Lets start with how. Unfortunately we are bombarded by so much negativity and hate that I think we lose sight of the good. There is good though! It really is all around us, we just have to be open to seeing it and receiving it.  For me this has come in the form of people. I feel the need to point this out, because I think as a whole we don't realize how our actions and words affect others. I don't mean in a bad way. I mean in a GOOD way.  A simple compliment, thank you, hug, text, call, may completely change the course of a persons day and outlook on life.  This has made a tremendous difference for me in the past year and a half. In the past three weeks alone, I had one friend mention me and another person in a post. Essentially saying that because she had received encouragement, she was going to give something a shot, that she was hesitant to do, because others believed in her and let her know! I cannot tell you, how it made me feel, that something that seemed so small on my part, made a drastic difference to someone else. I had another friend out of the blue compliment my photography skills and the way I raise my kids (at the time I felt I was sucking at both).  I have had champions in the past year and they do not realize the impact their actions have made on me and my life. Making my first friend in Texas, was life changing. she had no idea how much that saved me. We connected instantly, she feels like a sister to me now. I can talk to her when I'm sad/mad/happy. She will not BS me, she is a straight shooter all the way and I love her for it. Our kids play, we hang out together as a family. That sense of belonging changed me.  My neighbor who has become one my best friends. She ALWAYS has my back. If one of the girls is sick, she picks the other up from school, the water heater breaks down, her husband (also a good friend) is there helping. Our kids play. If she knows I'm struggling, she checks in. She cares and she lets that be known. It has literally changed and saved me more times than I can count.  I have a friend that I have known since the fourth grade. One of the positives of Facebook is that we reconnected after years. We text almost every single day. Sometimes it a funny meme, other times serious conversations. We have this insane connection that cannot be put into words. Her texts come through at the times I need them the most and she could have no clue. Having that relationship has changed me for the better. Then I have a husband that after 19 years, I am pretty sure we share a brain. He knows what I am thinking before I even say it. He also knows just the right time to say either, " You are doing a fantastic job and I'm proud of you" or " the cranky pants have been on long enough, time for a wardrobe change"! I love him all the more for it.  For me these are just a very few examples of how someone else's kindness, insight, text or call has made a direct impact on my mission of choosing to be happy. Choosing to be positive, choosing to go out and kick the world's ass, instead of it kicking mine.
That brings me to the "why" portion. Why do I choose to continue my mission? I know some people  think I am insane. That choosing to believe sunshine, happiness, faith, hope and little bit of pixie dust can make a difference, is annoying and delusional. I assure you. I am not crazy.  So why? Why am I seemingly so nauseatingly positive? Even in situations that seem to not have one ounce of any good?? Three words. Elizabeth. Abigail. Sydney.  I want them to ALWAYS search for the good, the happiness, the kind, the helpers.  Yes, the world is full of hate, evil, and negativity but it doesn't have to win. The battle against it has to start somewhere. So I am starting it at the most logical place for me, home.
If I do nothing else right in this life, I hope this is the ONE thing I get right. I want them to face adversity with the courage to know they can over come. I want them to throw love at the haters. I want them to be able to LAUGH, even when the situation seems dire. That is my wish, that is my goal. While I focus on that here. I want to share that it so easily spread. Make that call, send the text, give someone a hug or an unexpected compliment. Who knows, we just might change the world!

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